Real vs. fake

• Manja Maksimovič

This post contains lots of words. They were written in the last couple of years not by me but by various spammers. How much longer until we are unable to tell spam from real comments?

Real

v

s

fake

Ever since I encountered Ellen Hawley and the fun she has with her spam folder, I decided I wanted to keep saving the best spam bits that land on my blog as well. She is awfully good at presenting hers. Here is her last post on the subject from two years ago.

It must be how long I’ve been gathering mine. Here they are now in a compilation, practically unedited.

As you read, think about this: it may be that “Fooling a internet (!) is becoming harder”, as one spammer says, but how much longer until we are unable to tell whether a comment is the real deal or just a piece of spam trying to achieve whatever it is that spam tries to achieve?

In this case it has given me quite a bit of chuckles, so there’s that. The subject matter ranges from gibberish via jokes towards high praise and criticism.

The last line contains the most recent bit of spam criticism that my blog has received: “ничего особенного”. I can read Cyrillic and know enough Russian to guess what it says. Bear till the end and discover the future of spam in two words.

Each bullet point contains text from a different spam comment. They were usually found in the spam folder and promptly deleted.

  • A birthday is a good time to get sentimental. (How did they know?)
  • It is the best time to make a few plans for the longer term and it is time to be happy. … Perhaps you can write next articles relating to this article. I want to learn even more issues about it! Hello there! This blog post could not be written any better! Looking at this post reminds me of my previous roommate! He continually kept preaching about this. I most certainly will send this post to him. Fairly certain he’s going to have a very good read. I appreciate you for sharing! I’ve been surfing on-line more than 3 hours lately, yet I never discovered any fascinating article like yours. It is pretty worth sufficient for me. Personally, if all webmasters and bloggers made good content material as you probably did, the web shall be much more helpful than ever before. (Signed: foxnews.org. Really.)
  • Yesterday, while I was at work, my sister stole my apple ipad and tested to see if it can survive a 25 foot drop, just so she can be a youtube sensation. My iPad is now destroyed and she has 83 views. I know this is completely off topic but I had to share it with someone! (Oh, anecdote time!)
  • Todаy, I went to the beach with my kids. I found a sеa shell and gave іt to my 4 year old ԁaughter and sad “You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.” Shе put the shell to her eаr and screamed. There was a hermit craƅ inside and it pіnched her еar. She never wants to go back! LoL Ι know tһis is totally off topic but I had to tell someone! (One more anecdote. Notice the weird characters. I edited out some others.)
  • I recently found what I hoped for before you know it in the least. Reasonably unusual. (Tell me about it!)
  • Extremely best best strategy to capture attention in a sordid sea of sameness, is to face out. (Beware the sordid sea of sameness!)
  • This is the kind of info that are meant to be shared across the web. Shame on the search engines for not positioning this post higher! (Shame on them! I say so too!)
  • Can I simply just say what a comfort to discover a person that really understands what they are discussing on the web. You actually understand how to bring a problem to light and make it important. A lot more people should look at this and understand this side of the story. It’s surprising you aren’t more popular since you most certainly have the gift. (This last sentence is such a great example of what people say when they want something. Beware!)
  • Its like you read my mind! You seem to know a lot about this, like you wrote the book in it or something. I think that you could do with some pics to drive the message home a bit, but other than that, this is fantastic blog. An excellent read. I will definitely be back. (I could do with some pics, what was I thinking! And write a book!)
  • I precisely wanted to say thanks again. … It had been a very frightful scenario for me, nevertheless coming across the very specialised manner you processed it took me to leap for delight. I will be grateful for the work and thus hope that you recognize what a powerful job you were carrying out teaching men and women via a web site. Probably you’ve never come across any of us. (I never wish to come across you even if you leap for delight.)
  • I’m impressed, I must say. Seldom do I come across a blog that’s both equally educative and amusing, and without a doubt, you have hit the nail on the head. The problem is something which not enough people are speaking intelligently about. I am very happy I found this in my hunt for something relating to this. (Both equally educative and amusing, awww. Too bad you’re a bot.)
  • Hello my loved one! I wish to say that this article is amazing, nice written and include approximately all vital infos. I would like to see more posts like this . (Mhhh! And I would like that you keep away and stay away.)
  • I am sure this piece of writing has touched all the internet viewers, its really really fastidious (I had to google “fastidious”.)
  • Excellent publish, very informative. I ponder why the other experts of this sector do not realize this. You should proceed your writing. I’m confident, you’ve a great readers’ base already! (Ponder away.)
  • Wonderful items from you, man. I have take into accout you stuff previous to and you’re simply extremely magnificent. (An extremely magnificent man. Ja.)
  • I actually like what you’ve obtained here, certainly like what you are saying … You are making it entertaining and you continue to care for to keep it wise. I can not wait to read far more from you. This is actually a wonderful website. (I’m actually caring to keep it wise, how did you know?)
  • Money and freedom is the greatest way to change, may you be rich and continue to guide other people. (Bahhaha!)
  • Very well. But now tell me, you extravagant little person, what Oh, you must be! Wrap yourself up well. (Why don’t you say how you really think?)
  • You really make it appear really easy with your presentation but I in finding this matter to be actually something that I feel I might never understand. It seems too complicated and extremely vast for me. (Ahh, sorry not sorry.)
  • You are feeling like you’ve got a rainforest. (You say this like it’s a bad thing.)
  • Certainly like your web-site however you have to check the spelling on several of your posts. A number of them are rife with spelling issues and I to find it very troublesome to inform the truth then again I will definitely come again again (Only several?)
  • Best of all, take some time every day reading books and magazines. (Now you’re talking. You mean in order to check the spelling, yeah?)
  • Fooling a internet is becoming harder. (Well…)
  • This is not a bad thing, keep in mind. Something evil is coming for ten-year-old Aelfric Manheim. (This is really scary.)
  • ничего особенного (= nothing special)

In photos, views from the window from here and there.

  • Home in Tuscany.
  • Parents’ home in Ljubljana, Slovenia. The lion was made by a friend’s daughter.
  • My distant cousin Soki plays but these are from concerts. You know, when drummers throw them at the end.

22 thoughts on “Real vs. fake”

  1. ничего особенного, lol, great post, really made me laugh.

    May you be rich and continue to guide us! Manja for President!!!

    Ever since I went private, my spam folder has been empty. I kinda miss viagra ads.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    1. Ahh, you’re most welcome, Scooj. 🙂 Do you miss it? 😉 It’s My Sites –> Comments –> Spam. It’s the only place I look. But most of these are from previous blogs. Recently it’s repetitive and boring. I think WordPress is getting better at blocking the most of it.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  3. I think I won all the records for the length of the message a couple of times (by the same guy), a nonsense discussion about nothing. Now I am sorry I have deleted it! You could have used it for your collection! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. Haha, Flavia, yes, some are indeed very long. I only have a quick look at the spam folder and if something funny catches my eye, such as these here, I copy and save. I never pay much attention to it. These are all from previous blogs, I think, except the Russian one. Recently it’s only one and the same sentence all the time. Boring!

      Like

      Reply

      1. I have never understood the purpose of spamming. Does it really work? I mean they want to sell something in the worse way, boring people… What’s the use of it? 😳

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Oh my goodness – you and I have some of the same spam commenters! I love this post – I may save some of my “favorites” for a future post too. Great idea. So many bots out there trying to help me be a better blogger. Sigh. They are good for a laugh if nothing else (and for a fun post like yours). Such sweet photos from the inside too. I hope you are well.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. Haha, Andrea, I bet we all share them. Yes, they are so kind in wishing to improve us and we only make fun of them. 😀 Yes, here it’s more or less calm. But it’s a really boring situation in which to hit half of century as I will on Saturday.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

      1. Well, it serves them right as insincere as they are LOL. It sounds too calm for an important birthday celebration – hopefully you can celebrate again in the future…after “this” is over. Until then, Happy Birthday!

        Liked by 1 person

  6. I managed to translate “nothing,” but “special” was outside my I-can’t-begin-to-tell-you-how-limited competence. I get a fair bit of spam in Russian. It would take me weeks to decipher and even then I’d only have fragments, and it’s spam so why bother? But it always makes me wonder why you’d send spam in one language to a blog in a different language. Because it is indeed getting harder to fool a internet.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. Thanks for having a look what your example has yielded, Ellen. 🙂 Lately it’s been quite boring, so repetitive. Nothing to write home about. I see you’ve been quite busy on your blog. One day I’ll catch up. I hope you’re well.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

      1. So far, we’re good, thanks. Cornwall’s been relatively protected, but as our Idiot-in-Charge lifts some of the restrictions, we’re expecting that to change.

        Sorry–I’ll stop. I could rant for pages. Here’s hope that Italy handles things better and you’re able to get out into the world (and out of the spam folder) soon. Stay well.

        Liked by 1 person

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